OK, so i'll (D) do this meme thing too...

1. Three things that scare me:
Aggressive birds
Terrorism warnings
Jihadist birds

2. Three people that make me laugh
My wifey
OK, John Stewart makes me laugh too (esp. his America book)
That Koji's Kitchen gal

3. Three things that I hate the most
People who are just so sure of themselves and their ideas...
Not having a butler
7-foot tall swans that live in London (she'll never let me live that one down...)

4. Three things that I don't understand
The fine print
Why Germany loves David Hasselhoff
Why the Mets only go to the playoffs when I move out of town (see 1999 also)

5. Three things that I'm doing right now
Wondering exactly why this is called a "meme"
Realizing that i could never go out dressed like this
Sitting with horribly bad posture

6. Three things that I want to do before I die
Live in Italy for at least a year
Have a fabulous dinner again at Bouley in NYC
Start up and successfully run a business

7. Three things I can do
Watch an entire Mets game in under an hour (with DVR)
I can now wield me some power tools!
Move across the country and start a new life

8. 3 Ways to describe my personality
Relaxed and easy-going on the outside
Determined and strategizing on the inside
Always looking for a good laugh

9. 3 Things I can't do
Look graceful coming off a diving board
Dance salsa (or anything else)
Read (or anything else) very quickly

10. 3 Things I think you should listen to
The sounds in the background noise of your life
Your belly when you're really hungry
Your spouse (especially when s/he is really hungry)

11. Three things you should never listen to
Shouting
Doubters
Loud birds

12. 3 Things that I'd like to learn
How to speak another language
How to make chocolate chip cookies be a health food
How to cook like David Bouley

13. 3 Favorite Foods
Seriously! How do you narrow this down to 3???? This is the best I can do:
Mom's cooking
David Bouley's cooking
Treats

14. 3 Beverages that I drink regularly
Coffee, of course
Lately, Gatorade (lemonade flavor)
H2O

15. 3 Shows I watched as a kid
What's Happining
This Week In Baseball
The Odd Couple/The Honeymooners/Star Trek/Twilight Zone (In a row--Late night TV!!)

16. 3 people I tag to do this too
Dick Cheney
Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
David Wright